Don’t ask how I found this, BUT it cracks me up. I am an avid nana eater, so I am totally getting one.

Shall we vote on color?

“If we could read the secret history of our enemies, we would find in each person’s life, sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.”

~ Henry Longfellow

I was watching a show, on MTV (I’m lame, I know) and the guy on the show does gay porn and claims that he’s straight? Is that really a possibility? I just think that if you’re having sex, paid or not, with someone of the same sex, that sort of makes you gay. Am I wrong on this? Can you imagine being his girlfriend and finding out THAT secret? He was actually on the show because he wanted to tell his friends and family back home.

His mother must be so proud!! He even said to his one friend, “I fuck guys for a living.” Again, how proud his mother must be.

Today I took Monkey shopping for some clothes. It was fun and he is pretty easy to shop for. He isn’t too picky just yet. Anyway. We shop for him and then he says, “Mom, you should totally get some stuff.” Silly me.

I go to Aeropostle or whatever it is called and try some stuff one. What a freakin’ JOKE!! They really do have some cute stuff, but it is apparently made for anorexic, no boob havin’ 12 year old girls. I am not huge by any means, but good grief. I tried on two shirts, both medium and the first one was so tight around my arms and chest I could hardly breath. Good grief was all I could think. My arms are not much bigger than my 10 year old child’s (yes, I have wimpy arms) and my chest isn’t ginormous or anything. In fact, I’m quite small around. I digress. The second shirt I tried on was one of those, “Hey, I look prego, but I’m not” kind of shirts. It was cute so I thought I would give it a whirl. Uhm, yeah. The elastic that was supposed to go below the girls, poked my girls’ eyes out I guess if you’re a medium, you should be an A or barely a B. If only I could have my pre baby sized girls back. Anyway. I actually laughed out loud when I tried it on. Nothing ever fits me right on top. I dunno why, but it just doesn’t work out for me. I can wear tank tops and t-shirts, but that’s about it. Anything low-cut, off the shoulder, etc. does not work for me. Oh well. I kind of like to leave a little to the imagination anyhow.

After clothes shopping, I had to pick up a few essentials at Wal*Mart. You know what drives me insane? People in the self check lanes. I always use them because I can scan my stuff much faster than the cashiers and I don’t have to make small talk or get pissed when my cashier is rude. Today the woman behind me was a wee bit overzealous. She was all up in my business while I was checking out. She was unloading her shit while I was trying to finish paying. It just annoys the piss out of me. I wanted to say, could you wait your turn? You are seriously invading my space!! The register belts are not as long as a normal check out, so when someone starts unloading while you’re still there, it is quite invasive. And those are just a few of the reasons I HATE shopping!!