Last night, I laid down to go to sleepy, and as soon as my head hit the pillow I heard it. Da da da da da…EVERYBODY DANCE NOW!! I shit you not!! I thought I was hearing things or having a bad dream, but no, no I wasn’t. Someone felt it prudent to play that shit really loud at about midnight!! WTF?

It got better. After C+C finished, I got to hear someone singing something rather loudly. I was actually hoping Miili Vanilli would be next. Darn!! I did get to hear, “Betty Davis Eyes” after the horrendous display of 90’s karaoke. Oh joy!!!

Luckily it didn’t last too long. Either that or I was just too tired at that point to even care that there was an 80’s/90’s revival party happening in my front yard.

“He who angers you conquers you.”

~ Elizabeth Kenny

You think this is funny?

This is a joke to you, right?

Sorry, I am not laughing.

Do we ever just truly not care?  I don’t think so.

When we say, “I just don’t care!” THAT, is the point in which we have reached acceptance.

What $900 in textbooks looks like? Here it is!!

Did I mention that this is ONE semester worth books for me? Yeah. Gotta love the man, right? I figure I will be extra smart if we actually READ all these books Oh and the little thing with buttons, that is my ‘clicker’!! I know, you are jealous. Don’t be….well, yeah, you can go ahead and be jealous. I know I would be!!!

I am a smart woman, by most people’s standards, but I have never been so perplexed by something that should be so simple. Ordering textbooks!! Holy muckerfuts. What a pain in my ASS. I have received a double now because I was told I needed this online skill mess and low and behold, fucker arrived with a textbook I already had! Lucky me, I cannot return the previously purchases textbook because it was not the wrong book. This is the email I received from said company:

Dear Customer,

Sorry, this order cannot be refunded. Because it is not wrong book. If it is wrong book, then we can refund it. It is sent you according to the description which you have given to us.

Thanking you,

USA Books.

At least I was thanked for taking it up the ass without lube! ASSHOLES! I responded with a tiny suggestion: stop using people who do not speak English as a first language to write customer correspondence. Just a thought. Makes them look like total jackasses!

Now I have to try and recover most of my money at Amazon.com. Lesson learned.

I finished up the last little bit of lawn mowing this morning. High five, me. While mowing I noticed my front wheel had some serious issues. It was shifting from side to side pretty hard and actually sort of folded over at one point. I hand tightened it and figured I could make it through as there wasn’t much left. Guess I was wrong! While mowing the bumpiest area, I said to myself, if the wheel is going to fly off, this is what will do er in. About 5 seconds later….my wheel popped off! I said screw it and kept right on a goin’. I only had a row and a half to mow, so I just finished up. Have no fear, I got the wheel back on

” If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?”

~Unknown

So, there is this Hoodia Patch thing on the market, right? Uhh? Are we so lazy that now we cannot even take the diet PILL everyday? We have to rely on the patch to release the shit into our bodies? C’MON, people!! If you are that lazy, a patch is not going to solve your problem or fix that fat ass. Get your fat ass off the couch, open the pill bottle, get the water out the fridge, and take a fucking pill!! I mean, if your going to take stupid shit to make you skinny, you could at least put forth that much effort! Jeepers.

Is it really a wonder why America is so fat? We are putting all of our hope in some magic plant extract that sounds like girl parts. Oh and read the disclaimers, assholes! You still have to eat right and exercise. I have an idea. Save your money and just eat better and exercise. How about them apples? I am a fucking genius!!

To lie?  Especially when doing it in front of your child? Are you not sending the wrong message? You are an adult and they look up to you. They trust you for crying out loud!  In my opinion, no matter how trivial the lie, it should not be done in front of you kid!! UGH!!